Speak To What You Know.

Believe it or not, I went to church today. Which puts me in a position to preach to you (lol). I've been motivated to address an issue that's been on my mind....but I had been too lazy to bother.

JUDGMENT.

So the pastor took 2 seconds to talk about how even in church you get judged. They'll be lookin down upon the people who cry and shout and run up and down the aisles, talmbout "it don't take all that to praise god!" and such and so. But dude pointed out: You don't know WHAT the next person is going through. Maybe it doesn't take all that for YOU. Maybe you're sitting in the pew with a nice job, but the next person may not have worked for 3 years. Maybe your son is going to college in a few months, but the next person's son could be in Cook County Jail. Maybe you're in perfect health this Sunday, but the next person may have just finished chemotherapy on Friday. So then yeah, for THEM, it might take that much.

You don't know WHAT the fuck is going on with any person, with any situation, etc. So speak to what you know. Maybe she didn't finish school yet because she had to get 2 jobs to pay a mortgage and bills at age 18 because her mom was on drugs. Maybe she gained all that weight because she's sick and is on steroids. Maybe her girlfriend already knew she was at the club that night with So and So. You don't know a person's finances. A couple's arrangement. A person's LIFE.

And at the end of the day, why does it matter to you?

food for thought pt 2

this may ruffle some feathers. i look forward to it.

i was watching a Black in America special on CNN about Debt. interestingly enough, the whole episode was equally about church because Blacks are the most religious/faithful people in America (that's a real statistic - i kinda woulda thought it was Mexicans, but i guess not).

anyhoo. the common theme throughout the episode was that whatever wasn't understood at the moment was put "in God's hands." so it would seem to me that knowledge/information is directly correlated to what gets put in God's hands. and maybe the more you know, the less you have to take out of your own hands.

what say you?

Where Will You Move?

As a Chicago-based LesbiFriend, I figured it was my duty to report that the Civil Unions Bill has recently been passed in Illinois. Civil unions provide legal recognition of gay couples and gives them some of the same benefits automatically available to married couples. This is awesome and amazing because 1) living in Chicago, it's easy to forget that Illinois is country as shit... so kudos to our fine state for being so progressive so quickly (not even 10 states in the union recognize gay marriage or any of its derivatives) and 2) this bill gives us the right to visit a sick partner in the hospital, control disposition of a deceased loved one's remains and make decisions about a loved one's medical care.

domestic abuse

disclaimer: this post will depart from the usual money cars clothes hoes fuckery; i apologize in advance.

apparently i would be hard pressed to find a lesbian who has not been a part of some sort of domestic foolery with her girlfriend. this is not me passing judgment. this is not me saying that i've never gone to Crobar, double fisted Moet and Patron for free thanks to Missy the bartender, come home in my skinny jeans and Coach sneakers, and slapped an unwanted house guest because she was reluctant to leave. this is not me being unable to recognize that to err is human. and to forgive is divine. but forgiving doesn't mean staying with or going back to her. this isn't me telling you what to do either. but it is me saying that, in my 28 years, no woman that i have ever loved* has ever punched me, choked me, muffed me, slapped me, kicked me, stomped me out... nothing. it is possible to keep it cute and respectable even when you're so mad you could spit fire. this isn't me implying that if she hits you she doesn't love you, either.

this is merely me saying that though it may have happened to you before, and the majority of women that you know... it doesn't happen to everyone and it doesn't have to happen to you again. #weoffthat #ontothenext

*there was that one time my mom choked me up against the bathroom wall when she found out i forged her name on something for school... but i digress.

they look nice and carefree here.

but you and i know what went down in that limo!

Braids & Beads

I’m willing to bet my favorite cocoa butter lip balm that the
majority of people looking at this picture will laugh. But this isn’t funny. Nor is it tragic, unacceptable, outrageous or any of the words we usually look to when trying to describe an unfortunate situation. Allow me to introduce a more appropriate word: OBSOLETE.

ob-so-lete [ob-suh-leet, ob-suh-leet]
- adjective
1. no longer in general use
2. out of date
3. imperfectly developed or rudimentary in comparison with the corresponding character in other individuals

Synonyms: antiquated, ancient, old.

You don’t wanna be this. It starts with braids and beads. Then comes the throwback jersey, bandana and sunglasses in the club. And it always ends with hitting a waitress over the head with a bottle at Jermaine Dupri’s nightclub and being charged with felony aggravated assault. I know it seems like a far stretch, but the things that seem the most inconsequential often snowball outta control. The LesbiFriends aim to keep you off that slippery slope.

Thank us later.

raw & uncut: the truth, not cocaine (but definitely just as dope) pt. 2

QUOTE (from pt. 1):
women. you frustrate me! are you incapable of casually dating? do you know that you don't have to enter a relationship 2 months after a dating a cool chick? and you DO realize you said 2 months ago you were completely disinterested in a relationship... "YOU LIE!!!"

been doing more theorizing on this...
here's what i've come up with:
it's not that you chicks are lying; the issue is that we are on 2 different pages.

raw & uncut: the truth, not cocaine (but definitely just as dope) pt. 1

women. you frustrate me! are you incapable of casually dating? do you know that you don't have to enter a relationship 2 months after dating a cool chick? and you DO realize that 2 months ago you said you were completely uninterested in a relationship... "YOU LIE!!!"

more after the hump...